The first step to societal redemption is to give up your worldly possessions.

Give all of your possessions to charity, possibly selling a few things for transportation funds. Next, travel to the nearest equatorial jungle area and disrobe. Run hooting into the trees and join us, the feral faithful, who will be waiting to embrace you and help you transition to a more natural state.

No longer will you worry about finances, taxes, or confusing technology. Instead, you will huddle with simple folks in the jungle - washing only when it rains, basking in your natural, unfangled state.

Turn off your computer now, unplug your TV, and cast aside your cellular phone. It is time to join the neo-Luddites, Unabombers, and the crotchety as we pick lice from our collective backs in ignorant bliss.

The Fangling MJ